Existence FAIL

Posted at CARM on Dec 26th, 2010. Creationist: Vou.

Evos say the geneology between Jesus and Adam is not valid. Darwins geneology is also not valid.

It is not to be taken litterally.

His argument is this: can you actually prove Darwin existed? NO...you can't. *facepalm*

-Erin

Fossil FAIL

Posted at CARM on November 11th, 2010. Creationist: C4

C4: YOU are the one guilty of 'scientism' blind one. You aren't even close to scientific truth. What are you going to do when geologists dig up a T-Rex out of 70 million yr old rock and it is discovered that it has a human in its belly?

That day is coming.

Oh is it now? Bwa ha ha ha!

-Erin

Star FAIL

Posted at CARM on October 14th, 2010. Creationist: Dad.

Here is a series of posts by Dad. Just...read and enjoy.

Stars will fall to earth. Says the bible. A third of them. How big could they be??

Mt 24:29 -Immediately after the tribulation of those days shall the sun be darkened, and the moon shall not give her light, and the stars shall fall from heaven, and the powers of the heavens shall be shaken:
Re 6:13 -And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth, even as a fig tree casteth her untimely figs, when she is shaken of a mighty wind.
Re 12:4 -And his tail drew the third part of the stars of heaven, and did cast them to the earth

how big could they really be if they fall to earth?

(In response to "you don't know what a star is): Why don't you tell us then, and give an example of one a million ly or more away?

If stars are composed of more than, or other than physical only material, your scenario is trashed. How many little demons falling to earth would boil the seas??

Someone responds. Here are Dad's replies to the post.

"Stars show distinctive gravitational effects, and we can look at their composition from a distance"

Example of these 'gravitational' effects? You guys are one piece of work, Hawking credits present gravity with no less than creation.

"Like our own sun, they are composed of a great amount of matter, much of it in a plasma state."

Let's see the evidence for that claim. Story telling.

"Both their mass and energy output can be measured quite well, and of course their distance with different tools."

great, so measure all that for Alpha Centauri.

"Even assuming a bare minimum in size - and with marble-mass stars i'm being incredibly intensely careful - you're talking about an incredible event. Actual stars of any size falling on earth is really not worth calculating, since any single one would destroy the planet many times over already."

False. Not if they are not physical.

Alrighty then. Chalk up Astronomy as another scientific discipline that most YEC's don't know JACK about.

-Erin

WARNING - Agenda WORSE than Atheist's!

Every action these days is agenda based, everyone knows that. When an atheist is talking about freedom from religion - you know they're peddling their agenda and attempting to rule the world. Let's not even get into the Gay Agenda or the Left Agenda.

Why has no one mentioned or questioned the Dino Agenda? Everyone knows that avian dinosaurs (birds) were imparted with the Dino Agenda at the end of the Cretaceous Period. Right? You haven't? Well, allow me to educate you.

In layman terms it's a branch off of the Evolutionist Agenda located somewhere on the left side of the Agendosphere, as placed by the right wing Agenda Signer Squad, also known as the A.S.S..

Shrouded in secrecy since the Maastrichtian, where the first organized mammals split into left wing/right wing societies which caused the dinosaurs some concern, little has leaked out about the Agenda they subsequently created. Whispers through Area 51 and secret military bases have made their way onto conspiracy theory websites and forums, the informants usually found some days later with what appears to be an abnormal amount of pecking and talon-tearing around the eyes, ears and mouth - clearly a symbolic killing from the avian descendants of the original Dino Agenda creators that signifies "you were too close to the truth".

Here's what I know of this "Dino Agenda". Know that I am risking my very LIFE to inform you of this new threat to our security and our future.

It's interpreted to suggest that some time in the future, likely around the close of the year 2012, dinosaurs will have been so entrenched in the education system through the study of fossilization in the lower grades and the subsequent paleontologists and geologists that will arise from a passion implanted at such a young age that the process of finding and studying fossils will have, for more than 200 years, kept the higher functioning mammals busy and distracted. Distracted enough for them not to notice that the 2012 presidential candidate will be 1/1,999th theropoda.

Once placed into office, the new president will reinstate the descendants of the dinosaurs (birds) as the leaders of the country and eventually the world, causing a rise of non-avian dinosaur uprisings across the globe. Ruling the planet like their ancestors, they will finally strip the mammals of their status that they had become far too prideful of in the last 65 million years.

So you see that there is some concern over this "Dino Agenda". It may indeed surpass the Gay Agenda and Atheist Agenda combined. Let us unite against the some odd 9,000-10,000 species of Dino Agenda descendants and supporters and put a STOP to the education of prehistoric life in the lower grades around the world. YOU TOO can help this cause!

Donate now.

-Erin

Pwn FAIL

Posted at CARM on October 7th, 2010. Creationist: Eag.

She is displaying her misunderstanding and refusal to correct interpretation of the gamer word Pwn, or pwned (sometimes pwn3d).

Eag: Pawn is a legitimate spelling of pwn. Makes more sense too.

NO IT'S NOT! GAH! THE STUPIDITY!

-Erin

Weather FAIL

Posted at CARM on OCtober 5th, 2010. Creationist: Sport.

Topic: the weather cycle and whether or not it requires prayer for it to rain/snow.

Atheist: we have a pretty good grip on the weather by now - no miracles involved.

Sport: oh really. start at the sub atomic particles in the sky and work up. you can also explain to me how the water evaporates and forms clouds. I'd like to hear this.

Didn't Mrs. Jones in the 3rd grade teach you about the water cycle?

-Erin

Heredity FAIL

Posted at CARM on Sept 21st - 2010. Creationist: Fundy

Hereditary baggage is not evolution.

Yes...yes it is. Traits and heritable ones at that are VERY MUCH biological evolution.

-Erin

Grand Canyon FAIL

Posted at CARM on August 4th, 2010. Creationist RB.

RB: The GC is just sedimentary rock anyways.

Me: Negative - there are igneous intrusions at the GC seen at the bottom of the canyon.

RB: Rock type is irrelevant. The processes are the same except for very hard or very soft.

So...it's irrelevantif formed through erosion of harder rocks into layers of softer material or if it formed through the volcanic eruption of magma onto the surface. Yeah - that sounds like the same processes to me.

-Erin

Sex FAIL

Posted at CARM on August 7th, 2010. Creationist: SuperSport.

SuperSport: We tell our kids that God created them through our love.

RJ: However, when it comes to the actual biology of conception, I hope you go beyond that. Or don't you believe in sperm and egg either?

SuperSport: eh...the sperm and the egg aren't really important.

Oh really? No comment.

-Erin

Gay Marriage FAIL

Posted at CARM in the chat room. Creationist: B. Topic: same-sex marriage. Mountaineer_Elf is me.

[Bahama] Mountaineer_Elf then i am being discriminated because of my beliefs
[Mountaineer_Elf] bahama: lol!
[Mountaineer_Elf] I actually laughed out loud at that one!
[Mountaineer_Elf] that was good
[Bahama] in some sense its true
[Mountaineer_Elf] I'm gonna save it.
[Bahama] think about it
[Mountaineer_Elf] bahama in NO sense does some one in Connecticut marrying their same sex partner discriminate you because of your religion. ha ha ha
[Bahama] im being discriminated because i cant enforce my views on the public society in a democratic system to uphold laws

That's not descrimination, nerd. Democratic society means you don't have your right to FORCE your view. But you can have one. Nerd.

-Erin

Cover-up FAIL

Posted at CARM on August 3rd, 2010. Creationist (?): Eag

This guy's thread is a DOOZY. There may be SEVERAL posts from him today here at the fail of the day.

All evolutionists are part of the cover up. It is not God they are covering up, it is ET's. That is the real reason behind the show between creationism and evolution. They are actually OK with the masses believing one or the other---but not this. Religion is also part of the coverup. That was the reason religion--mainly Judaism and subsequently Christianity and Islam--were invented--the old pagan Gods were ET's and the ancient texts and religions are alegories and factual depictions of our true origins.

That's right ladies and gents - the battle between the educated (evolution/modern science) and the Creationists (uneducated/Bronze Age "Science") is because we're trying to cover up our involvement with ET's. :) Phone home someone!

-Erin

Plate Tectonic FAIL

Posted at CARM on August 3rd, 2010. Creationist(?): Eag

Eag: They [the Sumerians] knew that the earth had broken crust as continents and gave a reason for it--a clash with another planet, which is the planet the gods were supposed to have been from.

So...we have plate tectonics not because of the mantle or crust but because of running into another planet, huh? .....

-Erin

Homophobic FAIL

Supplied by Dan.

There are no homophobics here, go post your propaganda and nonsense elsewhere.

Please! No one fears homosexuals, people may be disgusted or pity their mental illness and lifestyles, but hardly fear them. Ever see a bunch of homosexuals in one of their parades???? PLEASE again, fear????

They look like a bunch of perverted clowns needing to be given a shot of Thorazine...

Methinks he doesn't know what homophobia actually means and that it doesn't JUST entail being afraid of catching the gay germs. *headdesk* Thanks Dan!

-Erin

Great FAILS

Howdy all.

I've seen a couple of these - but if you haven't, you need to.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Thunderf00t

Especially check out the series called "Why We Laugh at Creationists"

-Erin

Condensation FAIL

Posted at CARM on July 20th. Creationist DW.

Posted in response to his thread of "how many creatures have evolved in 500 years from leaving other species". THe question he is smart assing an answer (poorly) to is "how long are you allowing for this evolution to take place?"

I am always impressed when one feels the need to speak with such condensention, it is always very informative of who the speaker really is.

Nice. Water condensing on a surface due to evaporation has nothing to do with this conversation.

-Erin

Book FAIL

Posted at CARM on July 5th, 2010. Creationist: Bob.

Bob says that the Trinity isn't Biblical. I proved him wrong using only verses from the bible. When I confronted him, this is what he had to say:

[Mountaineer_Elf] Bob: I debunked oneness already.
[Bob] no you didnt
[Bob] you just copy and paste
[Mountaineer_Elf] Bob: I copy and pasted from the BIBLE
[Bob] elfy you didnt debunk anything at all, you just pasted some things from a book
[Mountaineer_Elf] bob: LMAO
[Mountaineer_Elf] from a book

Ha ha ha. The bible is just a book when it proves you wrong, eh?

-Erin

History FAIL

Posted in the chat room at CARM on June 30th, 2010. Creationist: Shot.

Paraphrased because his argument was retarded:
"You cannot prove history happened"

-Erin

Reality FAIL

Posted at CARM on unknown date. Creationist Dad.

NX: Reality is God's Creation

Dad: False.

Huh?!

-Erin

Slavery FAIL

Posted at CARM on June 18th, 2010. Creationist: HE.

HE: American slavery, and Egypian Slavery -- were an abomination in the sight of God.

YEah - because the slavery in 1800's America was mentioned in the Bible.

-Erin

Dinosaur FAIL

Posted at CARM on May 25th, 2010. Poster: North.

He made this comment in regards to something he said "dinosaurs couldn't have existed".

[North] no. thier mass and the spin of the earth would have made walking whale creatures immpossible

-Erin.

Evolution WIN!

Posted at CARM on May 24th, 2010. Atheist: Coke.

[ChristianH] Micro Evolution, right?
[R.E.] Define "micro evolution?"
[Coke] Where Horses don't give birth to dolphins.

BRILLIANT! LOL!

-Erin

Plague FAIL

Posted at CARM on May 24th, 2010. Christian: J

[NA]: I wonder if E. Coli will make it to heaven.

[J]: no, plagues wont make it

E-coli is a plague?

-Erin

Language FAIL

Posted at CARM on May 24th, 2010. Creationist: RD.

[RD] a.s.d.f do youknow why and how the 'speach gene ' only stayed with the Huminoid lines and with no other animals ?

Now...I don't actually know if there's a "speech gene". But...I'm inclined to believe that there isn't any more than there's a "cursing gene" or an "accent gene".

-Erin

Saved Fail

Posted at CARM in the chat room on May 21st, 2010. Calvinist: Elect.

[Mountaineer_Elf] Elect: I didn't say there was I simply asked if you could kill babies and not ask forgiveness and still go to heaven, and you said yes.

[His_Elect] correct.

WHAT?!

-Erin

Monkey FAIL

Posted at CARM on April 30th, 2010. Creationist: SGob

Response to a question about the similarities between chimps and humans:

When God was planning how he was going to make monkeys, He probably wanted them to have some of the same functionality that he planned to design into man. I think He probably made monkeys similar to humans in order to further delude those who do not love Him.

Yikes.

-Erin

Australia FAIL

Posted at CARM on April 12th, 2010. Creationist: DC43

Original post:

What is the creationist explanation for the different types of animals ithere? Why no kangoroos in Africa? Is it adaptaion? ARe there any kangorro fossils in other places?

Answer (sarcastic and joking):

The standard explanation seems to be that all animals on the Ark had strong homing instincts and they just followed their noses home.

A slightly better explanation is that there is a Mount Ararat in Australia, and the Ark stopped there to let off some passengers. (There is an Ararat in Australia.)

Creationist interjection:

Humm,,I allways thought it was spelled, Atheistville........That's the place where the athesist cram "Don't you dare believe in God!" down the throats of their children .

Wuh?

-Erin

Reality FAIL

Posted at CARM on April 23rd, 2010. Creationist: AV

Comment:

'So when the "so strong" belief is in direct conflict with observable reality, you think the more parsimonious conclusion is not that your belief is in error but that observable reality is wrong?'

AV's answer:

"Correct -- what kind of ambassador for my faith would I be, if I didn't believe it myself?"

So it's okay to deny observable reality as long as it's for faith? Here's hoping that you don't observe that train before it hits you because trains weren't in the Bible.

-Erin

Dinosaur FAIL!

Posted at CARM on February 23rd, 2010. Creationist/the Misinformed: DJ.

Question asked:
Question to Creationists: Did Dinos exist during biblical times, or is god just messing with us?

DJ's response:
Yes. Coelacanth.

BWA HA HA HA! Coelocanth. Dinosaur. Yeah. They're totally the same.

-Erin